This photoshoot was inspired by a poem from Halsey’s I Would Leave Me If I Could. The poem explores the feeling of living inside someone else’s body, of being controlled by another presence. I connected deeply with this idea because my creative side often feels like its own force, pushing me to follow where it leads. Through this project I wanted to capture what it feels like when that part of me takes over and blurs the line between who I am and the version of me that creativity commands.
Every morning the muse puts her finger in my nose.
One, then two.
Sliding into me pornographically.
She stretches my nostrils wide
until her slimy hand crawls past my deviated septum, in between my eyes, and into my brain.
Exploding into a fist
when she reaches the cavity behind my temples.
The muse is bratty.
She is smug.
She wiggles her fingers around defiantly.
She displays her palm expectantly, waiting for a present I will drop into it.
She brushes and tickles the walls of my skull.
The muse is a flirt.
She'll always tease but never put out.
Fucking bitch.
I so badly want to be liked.
Scratch that.
I want to be loved.
I want her to love me.
Scratch that.
I want her to leave.
I want her to scratch that.
Scratch that itchy itch of my swollen brain.
It's only awful 'cause the muse looks just like me.
Dirty fingernails and gummy smile.
But she sparkles the way only a beautiful woman can.
A beautiful woman is a car crash.
Excerpt from I Would Leave Me If I Could by Halsey
